now i realize 
writing a poem each day
can be really hard

up for the challenge
i try to transform pages
into poetry

finished for today
i await the new sunrise
and the words it brings

Ngoma
4/1/2009

Reality's a Painful Workshop

my writing process 
has no need for workshops
black coffee w/a spliff on the side
or a dogfish raison d'etre
not recommended for brave new voices
i'm sure academia would not approve
as free write battles form
i fill my pitcher with sorrow
lamenting for those who trade their souls
for student loans
mere penance to learn what can't be taught
it's the ancestral connection
the ghosts of centuries past
and my scars are as deep as the atlantic
as trees scream the memories
of stars and bars
from Wounded Knee to Afghanistan
uncle sam's misguided children
roam the earth
uranium depleted with hollow eyes
that shoot their wives on full moon nights
disillusioned w/the thought
that we are better off
now that the homeland is secure
400,000 more
stand at the door of war
blind to the fact that
imperialism comes in all colors
in this new world disorder
as we witness terror in plain site
dropping bombs on weddings in Pakistan
winning hearts and minds

so they tell us

ngoma
4/2/2009 a.d 
2/30

F.T.A.
(Support Our Troops/Bring Them Home)

My lover told me
that in past lives
I must have been abraxas
but the docs said it was
post traumatic stress syndrome
so i self medicated w/mushrooms and meth
trying to figure out the mess inside my head
now if you can handle it
we'll take a trip inside
put on your safety belt
if you want to take this ride
from the side walks of Virginia
to Pleiku's mountainsides
it was back in '68
after the time of Tet
when i crossed the burning sands
of Cameron Bay
where the stench of burning shit and diesel oil
permeate the air
u could tell I was a FNG by the cut of my hair
while short time screaming eagles and and 1st cav guys
w/stubbled beards
babbled endless stories about how Tet had been
w/the Mighty Vietcong over ran bunker complexes
and fought them hand to hand
or how the 4th Div got wiped out
in the Valley of Plei Trap
between Cambodia and Vietnam
Where the VC tied themselves in the trees
and those damn ak47's
had us on our hands and knees praying 
there was a God in heaven
low crawling thru rice paddies full of water buffalo shit
crawling underground as a tunnel rat
finding huge bunkers 50 feet of concrete overhead
when we found ourselves surrounded
many wounded many dead
Now,there up on a hillside
in a shack stretched out on racks
we identified the bodies
that won't be coming back
thru blood sweat and mayhem
we manage to survive
one day u're in the mountains
the next day in the streets
trying become accustomed to concrete beneath your feet
trying to collect your benefits in this land of the opportunity

welcome home soldier
you'll surely need a friend
cause you only return to where the cycle began
where you joined the military cause you got drafted
or you couldn't find a job
the  recruitment office in the ghetto
said be all that you can be
now your'e homeless and suffering
back from overseas
where statistics of homeless vets
add up to 300,000
where disability claims could take a few years
and while you get worst
it's easy for a soldier to die first
lost in a system waiting list 127,000
in New York alone and the numbers w/be mounting
coming home from Iraq and Afghanistan
plus the walking dead from the"conflict" in Vietnam
waiting on Section 8 and medical care
standing in line for welfare
after fighting on the front line for democracy
angry, scared, broke, divorced, depressed
hostile, resentful, suicidal and stressed
self medicated to relieve the stress
from the military to filthy shelters or the slums
sleeping on subways
thought of as bums
in this home of the brave
this land of the free

"I didn't fail my country-my country failed me"

ngoma
4/3/2009 a.d. 3/30

p.s. Just in case you didn't  know 
F.T.A. means Fuck the Army

My Truth May Not Be The Same As Yours

my truth
may be different from yours
that's one of the reasons
i seldom write in metaphors
these poems are therapy
i write them to help maintain 
a semblance of sanity
they keep my brain from being idle
helps me to be busy instead of suicidal
one of my so called friends
says i should read the bible
it's true i say i'm fighting off demons and addictions
but i only believe in what I feel and see
and don't care much for fiction
just like jesus my healing reiki hands
bring love and light energy to affliction
and that's the reason
i give praise in 7 directions

my yidaki's healing sound
aligning your chakras from root to crown
moving energy around
bringing light and serenity
as past present future
equals eternity
i was a ghost at the table
in 325 a.d.
if u remember reincarnation
u'd have heard of me
for i know that my spirit will always be

so my truth may be different than yours

i'm the reality u try to escape
the excursion u've been afraid to take
the future that will be what you make
the mistake that you don't have time to make
for in destiny there are no mistakes

this poem wants you to think
it's a beacon to guide you to the light

ngoma
4/4/2009 a.d. 4/30 NaPoWriMo Challenge

In Search of the Goddess on a Palm Sunday

the morning write
goes better w/ coffee
granola and yogurt help too
the rush of sugar and caffeine
kick starts my thoughts to
a pace that I can capture  on the page
didge music on the box
steve kent's "deep space"
transcendental meditation
searching for a resting place
we worry about life
i'm striving for ascension
u may say my energy is of a different dimension
the sister was a queen
looking for a king
but I'm seeking the return
of the Goddess energy

meditating on the beauty that's within
projecting perfection beyond confines of the skin
seeking to find the 3rd eye connection
from the past to the present and into the future
beyond the illusion of time
concentrating on the power of the mind

the process beyond the romantic
eternal love that's tantric
a place of peace sublime

transcending the illusion of time

ngoma
4/5/2009 a.d. 5/30 NaPoWriMo Challenge

Nu Gut Bucket Blues

I sing gutbucket blues 
naked and raw
as a bulldog's bite
jackdaniels straight
broken heart beat
lucky strike dangling from these lips
dominoes keep my company
playing for spare change
on the sidewalk
my occupation
since the factory closed six years ago
this depression
rents space in  the rooms of my cerebrum
and eviction is meaningless
to ghosts

demons break dance
in my psyche
the constant cry of crackheads
trying to cash WIC checks
w/a backbeat
empty pockets beg for spare change
bail out bankers beg for dollars
lecherous pick pockets of the poor
the raven's never more
sits like a vulture
on the carcass of the phoenix
coal is unaffordable

me and slaughter don't write happy shit
cause we ain't happy - shit
chattel slavery is still alive
the crap game of life is on
and everyone's in debt to the house
crapped out trying to get a handout
for chips
but what's a chip with out a fish
when nobody's giving out poles

So, I sing gutbucket blues
naked and raw
as a bulldog's bite
jackdaniels straight
broken heart beat

ngoma 
4/6/2009 a.d. 6/30    NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

..

A HERO'S FABLE FOR LITTLE BOBBY

two days after the slaying of the king
the sounds of we shall overcome
permeated the air
as righteous indignation
rebelled in the streets
suddenly there were no more cheeks to turn
as the mantra of burn baby burn
became the anthem
of the dreams deferred
awaking from slumber
the light of self defense
flickered in the consciousness
reflecting in the street
off the pig 
was the flava of the day
it was a time 
when righteous brothas weren't fakin
when they said today's pig
is tomorrow's bacon

and as the good book said
a child shall lead them
so they came w/rifles tall
Little Bobby Hutton, Brother Huey 
and Bobby Seale- 36 Panthers in all
standing in the Sacramento Court
like a mountain on a rich man's chest
and you can bet the state was embarrassed
when the news flash across the nation
showed Black Men armed and ready
standing up for their rights

now u'd best be believin' there's a high price for freedom
and the pigs came in full force to test them
for several days there was no peace
cops and panthers had gun battles in the streets
the panthers were armed to the teeth
and when the smoke cleared 3 pigs
lay wounded in the street
the surviving panthers were captured
stripped searched down to their underwear
the ku klux killer kop shot Lil Bobby 12 times
cause he didn't care that he was unarmed at the time
so i write this poem
for all of you who were too young
or just didn't take the time
to read the head lines

Little Bobby was the first to go
at only 16, a martyr that died w/honor
so if you're bad enough to have heat on your hip
locked and loaded with a full clip
here's what I'm saying
be u blood or crip
one day there'll be a time
when you'll have to shoot off
much more than your lip
now's the time for brothers to unite
there are real enemies to fight

Ngoma 4/7/2009 a.d. 7/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

Know the real enemy

Bobby Hutton was the first to join the newly formed Black Panther Party for Self Defense. He was only 16 years old when he joined but already believed in the ideals that Seale and Newton had outlined in the Ten-Point Program; he was dedicated to serving his community.

On April 6, 1968, Oakland police ambushed a carload of BPP members on a side street. An hour and a half shootout ensued, resulting in the death of BPP member Bobby Hutton and the arrest of all others present on the scene. Bobby Hutton was shot more than twelve times after he had already surrendered and stripped down to his underwear to prove he was not armed. The murder of Bobby Hutton was a major event in the party's history: it incensed them and inevitably made them stronger. 

THE TEN POINT PLAN

1. WE WANT FREEDOM. WE WANT POWER TO DETERMINE THE DESTINY OF OUR BLACK AND OPPRESSED COMMUNITIES. 
We believe that Black and oppressed people will not be free until we are able to determine our destinies in our own communities ourselves, by fully controlling all the institutions which exist in our communities. 

2. WE WANT FULL EMPLOYMENT FOR OUR PEOPLE. 
We believe that the federal government is responsible and obligated to give every person employment or a guaranteed income. We believe that if the American businessmen will not give full employment, then the technology and means of production should be taken from the businessmen and placed in the community so that the people of the community can organize and employ all of its people and give a high standard of living. 

3. WE WANT AN END TO THE ROBBERY BY THE CAPITALISTS OF OUR BLACK AND OPPRESSED COMMUNITIES. 
We believe that this racist government has robbed us and now we are demanding the overdue debt of forty acres and two mules. Forty acres and two mules were promised 100 years ago as restitution for slave labor and mass murder of Black people. We will accept the payment in currency which will be distributed to our many communities. The American racist has taken part in the slaughter of our fifty million Black people. Therefore, we feel this is a modest demand that we make. 

4. WE WANT DECENT HOUSING, FIT FOR THE SHELTER OF HUMAN BEINGS. 
We believe that if the landlords will not give decent housing to our Black and oppressed communities, then housing and the land should be made into cooperatives so that the people in our communities, with government aid, can build and make decent housing for the people. 

5. WE WANT DECENT EDUCATION FOR OUR PEOPLE THAT EXPOSES THE TRUE NATURE OF THIS DECADENT AMERICAN SOCIETY. WE WANT EDUCATION THAT TEACHES US OUR TRUE HISTORY AND OUR ROLE IN THE PRESENT-DAY SOCIETY. 
We believe in an educational system that will give to our people a knowledge of the self. If you do not have knowledge of yourself and your position in the society and in the world, then you will have little chance to know anything else. 

6. WE WANT COMPLETELY FREE HEALTH CARE FOR All BLACK AND OPPRESSED PEOPLE. 
We believe that the government must provide, free of charge, for the people, health facilities which will not only treat our illnesses, most of which have come about as a result of our oppression, but which will also develop preventive medical programs to guarantee our future survival. We believe that mass health education and research programs must be developed to give all Black and oppressed people access to advanced scientific and medical information, so we may provide our selves with proper medical attention and care. 

7. WE WANT AN IMMEDIATE END TO POLICE BRUTALITY AND MURDER OF BLACK PEOPLE, OTHER PEOPLE OF COLOR, All OPPRESSED PEOPLE INSIDE THE UNITED STATES. 
We believe that the racist and fascist government of the United States uses its domestic enforcement agencies to carry out its program of oppression against black people, other people of color and poor people inside the United States. We believe it is our right, therefore, to defend ourselves against such armed forces and that all Black and oppressed people should be armed for self defense of our homes and communities against these fascist police forces. 

8. WE WANT AN IMMEDIATE END TO ALL WARS OF AGGRESSION. 
We believe that the various conflicts which exist around the world stem directly from the aggressive desire of the United States ruling circle and government to force its domination upon the oppressed people of the world. We believe that if the United States government or its lackeys do not cease these aggressive wars it is the right of the people to defend themselves by any means necessary against their aggressors. 

9. WE WANT FREEDOM FOR ALL BLACK AND OPPRESSED PEOPLE NOW HELD IN U. S. FEDERAL, STATE, COUNTY, CITY AND MILITARY PRISONS AND JAILS. WE WANT TRIALS BY A JURY OF PEERS FOR All PERSONS CHARGED WI TH SO-CALLED CRIMES UNDER THE LAWS OF THIS COUNTRY. 
We believe that the many Black and poor oppressed people now held in United States prisons and jails have not received fair and impartial trials under a racist and fascist judicial system and should be free from incarceration. We believe in the ultimate elimination of all wretched, inhuman penal institutions, because the masses of men and women imprisoned inside the United States or by the United States military are the victims of oppressive conditions which are the real cause of their imprisonment. We believe that when persons are brought to trial they must be guaranteed, by the United States, juries of their peers, attorneys of their choice and freedom from imprisonment while awaiting trial. 

10. WE WANT LAND, BREAD, HOUSING, EDUCATION, CLOTHING, JUSTICE, PEACE AND PEOPLE'S COMMUNITY CONTROL OF MODERN TECHNOLOGY. 
When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bonds which have connected them with another, and to assume, among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the laws of nature and nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights; that among these are life , liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. That to secure these rights, governments are instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed; that, whenever any form of government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the right of the people to alter or to a bolish it, and to institute a new government, laying its foundation on such principles, and organizing its powers in such form as to them shall seem most likely to effect their safety and happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and, accordingly, all experience hath shown that mankind are most disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But, when a long train of abuses and usurpation, pursuing invariably the same object, evinces a design to reduce them under absolute despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such government, and to provide new guards for their future security. 

Epigram: "Writing poetry is like filling a pitcher and pouring it out. You have to be sure that the pitcher is full first" - Amiri Baraka

Empty Pitchers

Leave poetry addicts 
thirsty for words
to give meaning
to the contrast of
black ink across white paper
incoherent babble is subjective
but overuse of metaphors
leave readers puzzled
about why u shouldn't be confined
to singing in the shower
since no one but you
knows what you mean
the world is in chaos
and there's so much that needs
to be talked about
and some of us truly believe
that time is running out
for simple chitter chatter
going on and on
as if it doesn't matter
that babylon babbles on
while the economy is falling
one in ten americans receives food stamps
but at least they have food to eat
for global starvation is on the rise
3rd world babies w/swollen bellies
and sunken eyes is a reality
nations ravaged from war and disease
so it's truly a luxury for you to
jibber jabber saying nothing clever
whatever
spitting meaningless rhymes
that take up time from meaningful discourse
while you intercourse between these sheets
(of paper of course)
it's quite a relief to experience your silence
cause in this economy
paper is expensive
and ecologically a tree is a terrible thing to waste
so I don't mean to sound bitter
but maybe you should just twitter

.......

Ngoma 
4/8/2009 a.d.  8/30 NaPoWriMo  30/30 challenge

Bloody Karma in the Oil Field

xxxxxx
the ghost of ken saro-wiwa 
slips thru niger delta
in sweet revenge
karma in the balance
nooses at the ready
there is blood to pay
and this time,
this time, 
bribery won't buy salvation
as the prophecy
is satisfied
uttered from the mouth of the spokesman for ogoni
government on trial
for murder in the niger delta
subsidized by shell
when witnesses tell their stories
in the courts of new york city
the ghost will talk

then the giants
will sweat retribution
and monopolies will tremble
14 years of patient struggle
soon the payback w/be coming
and the ghost of niger delta
can return into the light

ngoma 
4/9/2009a.d.  9/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 challenge

"Violence is as American as Apple Pie" 
11/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge 

just when u thought it was safe to go back into the water
seinfool's friend bit the n word like a shark
sending the blood of racism
into the ocean of humanity
reverberating like 50 shots
as killer kops play one up like the dozens on diallo
collecting bounty at bachelor parties
cuz the lapdance didn't
translate to a blowjob
so - empty yr clip
the sound is orgasmic as they
spray 50 bullets like cum shots
and 92 yr old granmas have shoot outs
as kops break down her door
running up in her house like they paid rent
as she sent buckshot to answer the intrusion
so there must be some confusion
about what's considered as self defense
when the pledge of serve and protect
turns into disrespect
but,
what did u expect
as reality reflects
the image in yr mirror
hip hop blaring obsenities from yr speaker
mentacide implanted in yr future
past erased void of intellectual curiosity
dumbed down/numbed down
cause every one knows that
life ain't perfect in the suburbs
so tune in 
the rest of the world's in trouble
knocking down your picket fence
hand stuck out threatening suicide
but can't afford to die
cost of gas in the west is too damn high
destitution in your eyes
trying to gain sympathy from those who
believe in reincarnation whose only offer
wishes a better life next time

a drivers license 
is all that's needed to buy a gat
i'll put down my gun
when you pry it from my cold, dead hands
finger stuck on massacre
it's in the DNA
trigger dexterity fine tuned on video games
murder is painless just hit the off button
on the remote control
the OK corral was a picnic
compared to binghamton
so- have a nice day
in a place where the murder rate
is three times greater than Canada and the UK
Oh say can u see
that the anthem's a war song
bombs bursting in air
ingrained in the pysche
of those that traveled on the good ship mayflower
dragging their chains
thru the valley of death
seekin revenge for custer's last stand
so remember the alamo
he who lives by the sword dies by the sword
that's why i carry a loaded pen
it's 2009 and a switch blade just won't cut it anymore
mexican cartels buy arms from american gun dealers
and 3 cops were shot in Pittsburgh
by a guy who thought Obama was trying to
take his gun away
his shrink would say it's a dick thang
but in marlboro country shrinks are for sissies
silly rabbit
so 'scuse me while I smack the wife
it must be a way of life since it's all i see on my realityTV
because
america-----has a cowboy mentality

ngoma 
4/11/2009 a.d.  11/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 challenge

Dixie Warnings for Church Girls 
13/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 challenge

as a kid growing up in the south 
u'd need to read E. Franklin Frazier's Black Bourgoisie
to get the picture
it was the place of high yella gals
once the Black Mecca of dixie
where Maggie Walker placed her bank on Marshall St
soon after slaves were sold in the market place
the hustle bustle flourished
once the capital of confederacy
stood on 7 hills
Jackson Ward was Black Wall St of the East

the sun do rise
was the historic sermon of the day
in a place where slaves had run away
and many churches arose for
people to pray
and many places for preachers to play
or prey, depending on the time of day
it was before air conditioning so u'd 
best be conditioning yourself to the hot assed air
big flowered hats and hot combed hair

the gals in the front row squirmin' and sweating
young preacher in the pulpit
spittin' and grinnin'
trying to disguise his wandering eyes
that seem to be stuck btwn a thick girl's thighs
each time she shouted hallejuiah
you could read thought bubbles
they'd be rated adults only
preacher feeling hot and lonely
sister wanting him to be her one and only

so t'was no surprise
as she was leaving the church
she secretly pulled a business card
out of her purse
saying my home #'s on the back
i need special prayer
please call me

so sister was praying
that preacher man would come by
preacher man was scheming on
spreading those thighs
wondering what his stepford wife would do
if he got caught in his lies
see some preachers had a tradition of tipping
by the house after church for some
fried chicken or brain from a chicken head instead
besides not only was the reverend sneaky, 
but it's rumored he's a bit freaky
in his closet were many secrets

now sister girl was scheming about what to do in the sack
she figured to get the reverend cornerstoned
and then they'd diamond back
she knew that her bootay was the best
and he'd surely come back
now don't forget i told u that the reverend was freaky
he unzipped his pants to reveal silky pink bikinis
i know u think it won't get any worst
but the reverend loved women
that carried strap-ons in their purse
some say he should be whipped w/leather
but to him it would be a pleasure

so be careful what you wish for
you just might get it
and when it's all thru
u just might regret it

somethings defy rationalization
when the preacher gets screwed by the congregation
sunday's gossip w/be quite a sinsation

ngoma
13/30  Na PoWriMo 30/30 challenge

the bone reader said 
i'd been around for many incarnations
and upon meditation
could read the akashic record
thru my pineal gland
i'd remember many people
and many lands
for i had traversed the universe
on many planes
and that all paths lead back
to where i was a warrior slave
and that resistance
was in my d n a
and for that reason i would always run away
so that i could fight another day

in this incarnation
i must learn to trust
and letting go 
may not be good enough
to pay back my karmic debt
but trust eluded me
slipped from a hole in my rucksack
on a mountainside
on a moonlit nite
that turned into a thunderstorm
when i shifted shape into a bird in flight

perched on the edge of never
i looked out at forever
and it seemed like such a long, long time
to try to see the whole picture
while being locked in the frame
like a hunter whose been captured by the game
so i looked into the mirror and said self
trying to travel thru this plane
takes much more than wealth
like trying to get that mustard seed
thru that needle

see, me and trust had this falling out
it was so long ago i forget for what
but ever since emancipation
i promised that I would be owned by no man
or wo-man
for  my soul
yearned for sovereignty
until then it could never be free

so i plant my flag
in the crack of your universe
filling the gap
so we can feel whole again
traveling to a place
where energy will collide again
remembering harmony

ngoma 
4/14/2009 a.d.  14/30  NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

Poem For the Volunteer Coast Guard of Somalia
16/30  NaPoWrIMo  30/30  Challenge

Why Eye Rhyme On Time
17/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

i lurk in the corners of your mind 
between the lines of your news
i'm that indigo chile
that gives you the blues
that monkey that rides your back
like a vulture
i dissect what the pundits call culture
crack open the skull and take out the meat
exposing poison u pay for to eat
help u to become more selective
shaping a better perspective
i'm the poet your professor warned u about
the one to challenge your critical thought
the poet who doesn't believe in time
the poet that shifts your paradigm
the one who makes u take a 2nd look
the one who doesn't need a hook

i read the american psyche
i stared death in the face i'm not frightened
i'm protected  by gods and enlightened
i sanctioned the production of zeigtest
i project myself thru life w/o a flak vest
un like mc hammer - u can't touch this
i shine my light on darkness
i walk with one round in the chamber
locked and loaded for danger
like yoda I wield a light saber

see, i write because there's a need
to inform those who do not read
i'm reality in your face
i'm sure that you need a taste
i can tell by that look
when i say you've been took
so i've come to take u off of the hook
you've been baited
and the news on yr screen is quite tainted
so now you'll need a colonic
or a heavy dose of truth tonic

i've been trying not to rhyme for some time
but i'm infected w/hip hop
it's gettin real ill and i can't stop
but really, i wrote this poem to say
it's been a rough week
and it's kind of hard to write today

xxxx

ngoma 
4/17/2009 a.d.  17/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

T.G.I.F (or whoever is responsible)

A Love Story 
18/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

it was at a sunday evening church program 
that we first met
i'd also seen her once or twice at school
it was a kindergarten crush
turned into a love affair
we'd often walk to school together
who would have thought
it may last forever
it was really love at first sight
and once i heard her sing
i knew there was no turning back
she was a smooth brown
with perfect curves
and once i got up the nerve
to touch her perfect body
it resulted in a sweet vibrato
sometimes she'd come to my
music practice room
it was just large enough for a piano
up on the third floor
we'd close the door
for a minuet or too
it was my finger dexterity
and sensuous stroke that made the music float
like foreplay licking your ear

one day she says to me
look this vanilla sex is bland
and if you want me to stay
you'd best to find a plan
cause a sister like me wants to be heard
so bout that time 
i got her amped
she liked the way i played her pedals
when i plugged her in
we went to another level
as the music soared
it was electric

we both loved 
phat bass lines
with funk in the trunk
you might say i had her in the pocket
when we rocked it
the earth resonated
when my finger tips plucked string
u could hear her sing
like a band of gypsies
on a summer nite

she was a sweet thing
never jealous
when i fingered the flute
or sweetly kissed the didgeridoo
it was a ménage à trois of sweet harmony

that's why my first love
was my violin

ngoma 
4/18/2009 a.d.  18/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

The Recruiter
19/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

I used to have a handle on life, but then it broke 
now that the heat is on
i gotta wear more sunblock
i started to rob a bank
until i realized that wall st already did that
it's really a problem
since i'm addicted to eating
and the fast food joints are floating belly up
like dead waterbugs after the real kill
i started to join the army
but got turned down when they realized
that i could read the small print
it seems they couldn't handle a black man with a world view
since critical thought is not allowed
they only wanted yes men
i didn't come with instructions
there's no program to be down loaded
it's hard to make a soldier
out of someone whose religion is peace
the recruiter said that i should get a hair cut
i said there was a problem
i had cool hair
but there were no cool barbers
he asked if i were gay
i told him no but I'd fallen on hard times
and for cash he could suck my johnson
he said he would but was afraid that he'd
be dishonorably discharged
he was only there for benefits
he'd done two tours in Iraq
his brain was suffering depleted uranium rot
he realized he couldn't spend
the medals that he got
and the pawn shop wasn't offering much
for a purple heart
so he re-upped to sell dreams
that turn to nightmares
to the dispossessed
though he knew that it was bad karma
and his soul could never rest

said his emotions
stepped on a land mine
but the medics sewed him up
and said that he'd be fine
they didn't tell him that
to the truth he'd be forever blind
or that his acquired condition
would destroy his mind
so now he struggles with demon contradictions
a walking time bomb with twisted convictions

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

ngoma 
4/19/2009 a.d. NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

A Poem w/No Remote Control
20/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

i'd say that it looks 
like you need a bridge
over your troubled waters
cause the flood gate is open
and things are getting deep
plus there's no sale on boots
maybe you could get some water wings
to help you swim thru life
just don't bother me though
i need to take a nap
and I'm hoping that my dreams
won't turn to nightmares
or day mares
or any mares for that matter
I never cared for horse back rides
that went in circles
the smell of horse shit
was just too much to bare
so i avoid news with commercial
connotations
i need a vacation
from mass indoctrination
straight - no chaser
i drink my truth uncut

i need to take a walk about
in the out back
play my yidaki on a full moon nite
til ancient memory comes back
feel it's vibration
with meditation
put chakras on track
i need to fill my pitcher
with primordial sound
with my head in the heavens
my bare feet on the ground
then i'll give praise in seven directions
to be sure i don't miss the connections
traveling into the dream time
past ---> present ---> future sound

ngoma
4/20/2009 a.d. NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

Looking at Life thru Green Colored Glasses
21/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

a journey of a thousand miles 
begins with a cash advance
so if a trip around the world cost a penny
i couldn't get across the street
and i'm trying to escape
i'm hanging a sign on the door to my mind
saying out to lunch
be back in five minutes
but no one will know when the time is up
cause we be day trippin
in a land where all the clocks are broken
and we be on that free love
left over from the sixties
when we thought bannanas
could get you by with a little help from your friends
so this journey that i'm taking you on
may never end
but who believes in time

so i know i'm fly
i've been practicing for centuries
communicating with trees
i read the truth in their leaves
they carry ancient memories
whispered in a gentle breeze
on a summers night
if you inhale deep
you'll see we breath the same air
and the rain don't fall on one man's house
so the tree that falls in the forest
sends a ripple thru out the planet
from the pacific to the atlantic
it's wet all the same
so we give thanks for rain
the liquid of life
is water

gaia weeps
as whales wash belly up on the shore
vomited  by the sea
trying to purge the toxicity
of humanity
there's no filter to catch the refuge
from the interest on the plastic
and  a bandage cannot cover
the hemorrhaging tsunami
where she bleeds
 

xxxxx

ngoma
4/21/2009 a.d. NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

she never learned that love don't come with ass whippings 
22/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

the more I observed the situation
the more i wondered what was missing from her life
a mirror or a mama
or if her life mirrored her mama
perhaps she suffered a poor self concept 
or a man that didn't love her
it seems his standard of beauty was suspect
after knocking boots
there was nothing left
no post coital cuddles 
just a you can go home now - see
but home was the last place she wanted to be

it seems that's where her troubles started
in a house of mirrors that wasn't home
reflections of dysfunction
we'd like to call a family
but roots be missing from the tree
smoked or snorted
guzzled or main lined
it all goes to the brain
so uncle used to sit her on his knee
when she was only three
with his hand up her dress
his fingers rubbing her treasure chest
while mama didn't say a thing
see uncle was slingin'
mama was hittin that rock he was bringin'
besides that he put food on the table
and tapped that ass w/ever he was able
so she didn't go shootin' off from the hip
cause she could end up with a busted lip

now dawta was a quick learn
soon she figured flippin burgers wasn't the move
besides she'd gotten pretty smooth
at flippin nigga's
it made her purse strings bigga
plus she could earn more on her back
than standing on corners slingin' crack
besides, it wasn't lady like
and homegurl was a hottie
she could stop traffic w/that body
with her rear end in motion
she could float a ship with out an ocean
but i digress
didn't mean to change the subject from this mess

see while dawta was stacking paper
things had got a bit dangerous
so she came up with a plan that she needed a man
for protection and maybe give her life some direction
besides she figured even thugs need love
so she found a jack so she could play jill
it got so good she forgot her pills
now there's a bun in the oven

now thug life wasn't ready to be a dad
a broken home was all he ever had
he didn't even have a clue
about what he was supposed to do
druggin' and drinkin', fuckin' and fightin'
is all he knew

so after the druggin' and drinkin', fuckin' and fightin'
concussions and abrasions
he still had the audacity to say to you
please forgive me
i won't do it again
i love u boo

xxxxxxx

p.s.  in the u.s.a. alone, a woman reports domestic violence every 9 seconds 
we haven't counted the unreported

ngoma
4/22/2009 a.d. NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

Sister Soldier
23/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge
 

ngoma 
4/23/2009 a.d. NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

They Walk Thru Life with Eyes Wide Shut 
24/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

in denial that their tv sets lied
that their holy books are plagiarized
by amnesia patients
suffering post traumatic stress
since the spanish inquisition
trading land for beads and bibles
to those who could not read
then forced to believe
that the cross would save them
they said believe us
but it didn't save jesus
immaculate conception
reincarnation
resurrection
or suffer the wrath of the sword
in those days of dark called medieval
ruled by societies secrets
degrees and planets
evicted from temples
numbers keepers
king james, the filthy, drunken, pervert
seized the scrolls
and flipped the scripture
but never got instructions
to decipher the inscriptions
passed down by master teachers
otherwise known as egyptians

so tell me
who's defining this definition
did he fit the description
in the line up of those accused of treason
tell me buddha
what do you think
of this new guy jesus
should we ask krishna
if he's come to confuse us
after all 
crusaders burn witches at the stake
so was he sent to deceive us
with the veil of misconception
that there was only one
immaculate conception
crucifixion
resurrection

well first you'd better take a look
at the planets ancient mystery books
it doesn't take a c.s.i
to know there were thieves in the temple
word -
that lying judas
you mean he didn't speak of
horus or attis
khrishna or dionysus
buddha or mithra
and those of every family

you'd best to find the righteous path
learn the science and the math
to play the dozens
to every thing there is a season
12 tribes = 12 disciples = 12 constellations
or planets around horus the sun
the secret of life is one

how do i know this you ask
at high noon i shape shifted into a dove
i was there -

when he stood
in a circle squared
 

xxxxxxx

ngoma 
4-24-2009 a.d.  NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

The Invisible Ones
25/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

the stench of dire straights precede them
you recoil at the idea
the subway is their bedroom
in a town that never sleeps
u wonder how they got that
cart from the super market
with all of their possessions
on to the subway car
a multi purpose utility vehicle for the disposessed
escapees from homeless shelters
laying at gated entrances to fancy shops
the grated heat beneath the street
stepped over by the fortunate
huddled in rags to fight the cold
collecting change for opening doors
in this town where it's rumored
that the streets are paved with gold
the ghost of tin pan alley
have returned to claim their souls
and we've come a long way
since an apple was a nickle
so hey diddle diddle
i ponder as u fiddle
who really has the answer to this riddle
when you're stone cold dead on the side walk
will anyone know you're gone
this ain't no simple song
just looking for an opportunity
in this land yet to be free
circa tweedle dum and tweedle dee

xx

a poem for nappy headed goddesses 
26/30  NaPoWriMO 30/30 Challenge

uh huh, i like it kinky
naw, not yr sex life
but yr hairstyle
makes me feel buck wild
cause i know 
that bush is alive
and those antennae some call locks
got u locked into the oneness
cause every goddess' body 
has her own universe
that's why I write this verse to celebrate yr coils
not that dyed, fried, layed on the side
but nappy and alive
you know
that freedom hair
the gift from mother afrika
in a style that says you're proud to be
nappy and free

so now you see
don't bring that perm for me
i like it naturally
you can leave the wax alone
and leave your razor home
cause when the time is right
I want to know you're grown
no not that mini-skirt

don't want that gansta look
like you never read a book
cause with those lovely dreads
i want to get  in your head
before we get in  bed
uh huh we'll get there too
but first I want to know u - boo

so leave your wig at home
and those fake eyelashes too
plus all that make up
don't do a thing for you
i love the natural beauty
that was given to you
i like that natural creativity
that resides inside
not what cosmopolitan 
and vogue tells you is fly

ngoma 
4/26/2009 a.d.  NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

Monday
27/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

came to soon as usual
singing that
back to the grind blues
springtime bringing its fever
with a vengeance
no antidote available
the idea of playing hookie
from the school of strife
snatches my attention
like the multitude
of beautiful women strolling
thru the park
a true perk of
living in new york city
where people watching
is far more interesting
than the desk my ball is chained to
with imagination bent on escape
waiting for the time clock
to catch up to my daydreams

ngoma 
4/27/2009 a.d. NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

Tomorrow 
28/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

and so you ask
what will you write about tomorrow
and i say
tomorrow is not promised
so i write for today
for tomorrows are built from yesterdays
and it's right now that really matters
that's why i seldom waste much time
with simple rhyme
i try to be precise with every line
trying not to leave out anything
that you need to know to grow
i plant these seeds of knowledge
water them with overstanding
cause these words be demanding 
that you pay attention to the direction
as we strive for progressive perfection

i delve into the past, present and future
my totem is sankofa
my guardian angels provide protection
so i boldly prophesize new directions
so remember the axiom
never put off til tomorrow
what you can do today
for tomorrow isn't promised
and there may be no more time to do
all we can to be free
and if we don't take care of business today
there may be no tomorrow anyway

ngoma 
4/28/2009 a.d. NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

Slippery Soapboxes 
29/30 NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge

the glass might be half full 
but it's still half empty all the time
it's the dialectics
of a balanced perspective
that helps to go figure
what's false or true
that may depend on the upside of the coin
in a world of credit cards
stacked like a castle in the wind
that's about to fall
a crap shoot in a bankrupt gambling house
playing blackjack where face cards
are the only thing in the deck
hi rollers bet the universe
sell us living room seats on pay per view
there's a slot machine in the bathroom
so addicted gamblers
won't have to stop to take a shit
and the waitresses do brain damage
when the cash is right
and the pole dancers keep u entertained all night
ordering drinks and charging chips
running a tab and leaving big tips
from bail out money to AIG

meanwhile
i'll take you across the tracks
where folk bare footed live in run down shacks
a out house in the yard out back
a bowl of beans and maybe rice
definitely not paradise.
living below the wire
never had a job to register
for sharecropping
begging for an opportunity
to come to this place of so called opportunity
cause home ain't what it used to be
they'll take samples of your d n a 
to be sure you won't run away
to this poverty
to stand in the unemployment line
being commanded to speak broken english
while they'll inoculate you from swine flu 
DAMN- maybe i should just have done a haiku

ngoma 
4/29/2009 a.d.  NaPoWriMo 30/30 Challenge